Coming Soon...

I have begun my blog on Esther. However, it's getting late and I need to start getting ready for work. Stay tuned!!!

Faith of David

"The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine." - 1 Samuel 17:37

King David had a pure and beautiful faith in His God. He listened to God and knew that what seemed impossible to humans was possible with God. His faith in God was put to the test that day. He marched into battle anyway - that was his works proving his faith.

"David said to the Philistine, 'You come against me with sword and spear and javelin, but I come against you in the name of the LORD Almighty, the God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied.' " - 1 Samuel 17:45

Wow! My prayer is that I too have a pure and complete faith in whatever I face in life. I know I have a few big battles coming my way soon (biggest is Kyle's deployment). However, with King David as my example, I too can march into battle with my faith in God behind everything that I do. However, the warning should be said that we should always make sure that we are marching in God's will and remaining close to Him. That is most important. Going out ahead of God can be a dangerous thing (see Numbers 14:39-45). Listen to God and then GO when and where He says to go. He'll be there in "battle" with you.

1 John 5:14-15

Hello friends.

I know I have been away for a while. Part of the reason is because I have been traveling around the country (NM, AZ, GA, KY). Part of it is because I've neglected my blog. I have been more diligent in my quiet time, but not perfect.

I have also temporarily gotten off the path of blogging about women in the Bible. However, I have a VERY good reason for not getting back on that topic today... my book is in the car and it is 5 degrees outside!!! It's just too cold to trek out there at this moment.

"And this is the confidence which we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will He hears us. And if we know that He hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have obtained the requests made of Him." - 1 John 4:14-15

These verses were part of today's readings. They struck me as I was reading and praying. I have a very sincere prayer request. It's one that I pray every day. However, I also make sure to pray that if it is His will that it happen. The key phrase that stuck out for me was "His will." If it's not in His will, then I don't want it. I have confidence that God's will for my life is far better than my own desires. The way I try to stay in His will is by staying in the Word of Christ. I am a firm believer that if I abide in His word, He will guide my heart. If I remain in His word, then I also remain in prayer and in my quiet time. In those quiet times I try to remain silent so that I can hear His desire for my life. I have confidence in Him.

Titus

I have always heard about Titus 2 women:

"Bid the older women likewise to be reverent in behavior, not to be slanderers or slaves to drink;p they are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children to be sensible, chaste, domestic, kind, and submissive to their husbands, that the word of God may not be discredited." - Titus 2:3-5

Titus 2 women are the women that keep God's word alive and show us from experience how to live a God-like life. I want to take this time to thank all of the Titus 2 women in my life (some are younger, but most are older than me). I'm sorry if I forget any. If you know any of these women on the list, I urge to get to know them better and learn from them. Each holds a piece of God's word in her heart: Carolyn Estepa (my mom), Zelda Hill (my grandma), Cherie Trottier (my mother-in-law), Linda Reese, Dege Leedy, Beth McDaniel, Anna-Lisa Madiera, Keri Wilhite, Sally Kennedy, Laurie Hill, Sam Lambert, Shannon Clarkin, Heather Walker, Kristin McLendon. Thank you, women. Continue your hard work for the Lord.

However, my blog does not end there. Titus 1 speaks to the men. I always focused on Titus 2, but today the Lord made me focus on Titus 1.

For a bishop, as God's steward, must be blameless; he must not be arrogant or quick tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of goodness, master of himself, upright, holy, and self-controlled; he must hold firm to the sure word as taught, so that he may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and also to confute those who contradict it. - Titus 1:7-9

Blameless was defined in an earlier verse as a husband of one wife, and his children are believers and not open to the charge of being profligate or insubordinate. I'm blessed to have Titus 1 men in my life as well. These men, like the women mentioned above, are essential to my growth in Christ. Thank you to the following men: Larry Estepa (my daddy), Jimmy Hill (my grand-daddy), Andy Trottier (my father-in-law), Kyle (my husband), Brian Kennedy, Father Charlie, Father Winchel, Pastor Madiera, Paul Lambert, Terry Leedy, Shane Gray, Father Ross, Father John, Phil Reese, Jason Walker.

Thank you, God. You have provided wonderful role models in my life. I hope to someday be a Titus 2 woman and to help raise Titus 1 men.

Hannah

I have been avoiding Hannah for the last few days because she is so close to my heart. Many of you know that Kyle and I decided to try to start a family this past fall. My heart was aching for a child and working with children was becoming increasingly difficult. That's when I re-discovered Hannah and her prayer in 1 Samuel. I prayed as Hannah prayed. The next day I found out that I was pregnant. I was overjoyed!! Kyle and I began dreaming and praying and planning. I found out that I was already 4 1/2 weeks along and quickly figured out the due date of June 3, 2010. However, God had other plans. Two weeks before Thanksgiving, during our second ultrasound, we discovered that the baby stopped developing. This ordeal has rocked me to the core in many areas of my life and soul. I now have another prayer - for my child in Heaven. However, Hannah has remained close to my heart. I keep telling myself what Hannah's husband asked of her in verse 8, "Don't I mean more to you than 10 sons?" Hannah is an inspiration to me and I hope she is an inspiration to you.

Here is a quote from the book Life Principles From The Women Of The Bible, to set-up the time in which Hannah was living:

The events in the life of Hannah, recorded in 1 Samuel, occurred... close to the period of the judges, just prior to the period of the monarchy beginning with the choice of Saul as king (1051 BC). It was a period of spiritual decline and corruption. Israel was marked by a wandering heart. The final verse of Judges summarizes it well, "In those days there was no king of Israel; everyone did what was right in his own eyes" (Judges 21:25). It is during this time that we are introduced to the family of Hannah.

Scriptures:

1 Samuel 1:2-8

He had two wives; one was called Hannah and the other Peninnah. Peninnah had children, but Hannah had none. Year after year this man went up from his town to worship and sacrifice to the LORD Almighty at Shiloh, where Hophni and Phinehas, the two sons of Eli, were priests of the LORD. Whenever the day came for Elkanah to sacrifice, he would give portions of the meat to his wife Peninnah and to all her sons and daughters. But to Hannah he gave a double portion because he loved her, and the LORD had closed her womb. And because the LORD had closed her womb, her rival kept provoking her in order to irritate her. This went on year after year. Whenever Hannah went up to the house of the LORD, her rival provoked her till she wept and would not eat. Elkanah her husband would say to her, "Hannah, why are you weeping? Why don't you eat? Why are you downhearted? Don't I mean more to you than ten sons?"

1 Samuel 1:10-11,13-16

In bitterness of soul Hannah wept much and prayed to the LORD. And she made a vow, saying, "O LORD Almighty, if you will only look upon your servant's misery and remember me, and not forget your servant but give her a son, then I will give him to the LORD for all the days of his life, and no razor will ever be used on his head." Hannah was praying in her heart, and her lips were moving but her voice was not heard. Eli thought she was drunk and said to her, "How long will you keep on getting drunk? Get rid of your wine." "Not so, my lord," Hannah replied, "I am a woman who is deeply troubled. I have not been drinking wine or beer; I was pouring out my soul to the LORD. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief."

1 Samuel 1:18-20

She said, "May your servant find favor in your eyes." Then she went her way and ate something, and her face was no longer downcast. Early the next morning they arose and worshiped before the LORD and then went back to their home at Ramah. Elkanah lay with Hannah his wife, and the LORD remembered her. So in the course of time Hannah conceived and gave birth to a son. She named him Samuel, saying, "Because I asked the LORD for him."

Hannah's husband, Elkanah, was from the tribe of Levi. In verses 3-5 we are able to see that they are a devout family. In a time when Israel was going their own way and falling away from God, this family continued to go sacrifice to God.

Peninnah used Hannah's bareness as a way to provoke Hannah. Year after year Hannah not only faced Peninnah and her children, but had to endure Peninnah's mean words. Peninnah provoked her until she "wept and would not eat." It is interesting to me that Hannah never lashed back. That is something that I need to learn. Although she was hurt she never said nasty words back to Peninnah. Instead, she turned to God and prayed. She prayed so hard that it appeared as if she was drunk. Instead she said, "I was pouring out my soul to the LORD. Do not take your servant for a wicked woman; I have been praying here out of my great anguish and grief." It was after praying that she "ate something and her face was no longer downcast." Prayer does that for me. When I'm sad or troubled and I pray, I no longer feel sad or troubled. The world looks a bit brighter.

After she poured out her soul to the Lord and "was no longer downcast" that the Lord remembered her and she conceived a son. When Samuel was old enough to be weened she gave him over to the priest. She dedicated him to God. In her faithfulness she conceived more children as well.

We are all, at times, in a state of barrenness (no husband/wife, no job, no children, no friends, etc). Are you resentful or are you simply burdened down with the weight of circumstances you never dreamed you would face? If so, I urge you to turn to God in prayer. I have had to do that a lot these last few weeks.

Hannah had a heart of worship - gratefully receiving the life God gives and, in turn, wholeheartedly giving that life back to Him. When we surrender to the Lord and His will, we will truly be satisfied from the inside Hannah. That is what we see in Hannah. Another great verse that fits here is Romans 5:3-5.

Prayer:

Lord, I thank You that You care for me just like You cared for Hannah. Thank You for the humbling circumstances You have either allowed or authored in my life. I admit many of them have hurt me. I can see some of the good that has come from the, but I admit I don't see all the good yet. I thank You for what I can see, and I choose to trust You for what I can't see. What is most important is that You see. That's what matters. I thank You that You see me - my circumstances, my "barrenness," my relationships, and my longings. Teach me to pray, to surrender, and to live in the blessing You give. I pray this int he name of Jesus Christ, my Lord. Amen.

Luke 2:52

Merry Christmas (a day late)!!! I have one simple verse that really spoke to me yesterday (I haven't done my quiet time yet... that is next on my agenda). Hopefully this blog will be shorter for you.

Luke 2:52

And Jesus grew in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.

This verse was sited while I was studying Proverbs 31 (the virtuous woman). It gave me such hope. This verse, though small, is packed with ideas. First, "Jesus grew" shows that he was developing in certain areas (there will be four). This means that although He was perfect throughout His life, He was still learning and developing and didn't have it all from infancy. The four areas are:

1. Intellectual - "Jesus grew in wisdom" He had to learn things just like other children would. This shows his fully human side. He was a carpenter by trade - a trade he had to LEARN.
2. Physical - "Jesus grew in ... stature" He, being fully human, had to grow from infancy to an adult. (This could also be a reminder to adults who are no longer growing taller to make sure to take care of our bodies)
3. Spiritual - "Jesus grew... in favor with God" Although Jesus is part of trinity of God, He still GREW in favor with God. He had to continually work on His relationship with God the Father. Jesus is a great example of a person devoted to prayer. A person who was able to do the great and wonderful things because of His relationship with God the Father.
4. Social - "Jesus grew... in favor with... men" Jesus was certainly loved, but also hated, by many. He had to work on human relationships too.

Those 4 areas seem to be the same 4 areas that are in each of our lives. Luke 2:52 could easily be used as a measuring stick for us... let me change the wording a bit...

"And Hilary, what are you doing to grow in wisdom and stature and in favor with God and men?"

Learning from Jesus

I'm not neglecting the study of Biblical women. However, considering it is Christmas Eve, I decided to shift focus for a moment. Fr. John (here in Los Alamos, NM) recently spoke about the fact that the Advent season and the Christmas season is all about what God has done for us. In that light, I studied two chapters this morning learning from Jesus through Luke's gospel. He has given us many blessings - one of the biggest and most significant being HIS word.

Luke 13 & 14 are packed full of great teachings. I could spend hours relaying all that I learned today alone. However, I'm going to try to keep this blog short (that's always my goal and I always end up long-winded or long-typed). Therefore, I'm going to focus on two sets of verses.

Luke 13:19, 21:

" 'It is like a grain of mustard seed which a man took and sowed in his garden; and it grew and became a tree, and the birds of the air made nests in its branches.' "

" 'It is like leaven which a woman took and hid in three measures of flour, till it was all leavened.' "

These verses are talking about very small items - mustard seeds and leaven (I'm assuming is yeast). Jesus is showing us that we only need a small amount of faith. A small amount of faith in God can produce BIG results. It's not about what we can do. It's all about what God can do with what we can offer Him. What a blessing that HE has done for us.

Luke 14:15-24 (selected verses from the bigger passage. For whole passage follow this link: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=luke%2014:15-24&version=NIV)

¹⁵When one of those at the table with him heard this, he said to Jesus, "Blessed is the man who will eat at the feast in the kingdom of God." ¹⁶Jesus replied: "A certain man was preparing a great banquet and invited many guests. ¹⁸"But they all alike began to make excuses. The first said, 'I have just bought a field, and I must go and see it. Please excuse me.' ²⁰"Still another said, 'I just got married, so I can't come.' ²¹"The servant came back and reported this to his master. Then the owner of the house became angry and ordered his servant, 'Go out quickly into the streets and alleys of the town and bring in the poor, the crippled, the blind and the lame.' ²⁴I tell you, not one of those men who were invited will get a taste of my banquet.' "

Upon reading this I thought, "why wouldn't they go to a feast?" Then I remembered all the times that God was waiting for me to spend time with Him, which would bless me more than a feast, but instead I did other things. Instead I tended to work needs (like the man with the field) or I chose to spend time with someone else or I chose to sleep or I chose to watch TV. The key phrase is that "I chose" to do other things. When God calls us (like the man who called many to a feast) we should GO. Do not make excuses. You will be blessed more if you simply GO. Sometimes that is hard because you don't understand why God wants you to do the thing you feel called to do. However, going back to the previous verses, simply have little faith and God will give you great reward (maybe not Earthly reward, but certainly Heavenly reward, which is far greater).

Merry Christmas Eve!